


Shapeshifters, How do They Work?

by orphan_account



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Gen, Stream of Consciousness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:42:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23684092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: written for the genprompt_bingo square 'Shapeshifters'
Kudos: 3
Collections: Gen Prompt Bingo Round 18





	Shapeshifters, How do They Work?

Derek opened the door and found Stiles standing on his doorstep. Stiles pushed past him into the loft.

"Please Stiles, come in. Make yourself at home." Derek crossed his arms and gave his most unwelcoming glare.

"I have some questions about shifters. Stop glaring at me! Scott needs to know this stuff."

"Why doesn't Scott come ask me himself?"

"He's busy with Allison enacting tonight's episode of 'Romeo and Juliet : The Werewolf Years'."

"Does he know how that story ends?"

"Nah, he didn't make it through the Cliff Notes. Anyway. Questions. Are there other kinds of shifters besides werewolves? I weighed Scott before and after he shifted and his weight was the same. Conservation of mass and all that. You'd have to shift into an animal that's about the size of a human right? You couldn't be like, a were pigeon. Unless you shifted into a whole flock of pigeons. How much does a pigeon weigh?" He pulled out his phone and consulted Google. "Oh hey this book looks cool. 'Wizard of the Pigeons.'"

"Stiles!"

"Sorry, sorry." He put his phone away.

"And yes there are other species of shifters. And there are no were pigeons."

"Okay good to know. How about healing powers. Are you like Deadpool? If I had cut off your arm would it have grown back?"

"No we can't regrow limbs. We're wolves, not starfish." Stiles opened his mouth and Derek interrupted him. "There are no were starfish." Derek smirked at Stiles. "I could give you the bite and you could find these things out for yourself."

"No no no. Can you imagine it? ADHD and werewolves, not a good mix. I would not make a good werewolf." 

"I'd put a shock collar on you and do some obedience training."

"Hey! You give me the death glare whenever I make a dog joke. Why do you get to make dog jokes?"

"What makes you think I was joking?"

Stiles jumped up. "Okay thanks got to go." He hurried out the door.


End file.
